I haven't been awake during the daytime since New Years Eve...URG!
um...that's all I really had to say...I miss day light. I miss stores being open when I need to go to them... I miss good coffe. I miss school. I want a boy. I'm tired of being happy. I feel like a petulant child right now, and dammit, I'm going to whine like a little brat for ten lines or so! I was thinking yesterday that I'm an adult now, and all my chances for acting like a kid are all used up now. No one will ever take care of me again. *sigh* It might not seem any different from my circumstances before, but they are to me. Because before, I should have been a kid. Adults look at the number eighteen, and think young...but I was always in such a hurry to grow up, I never really enjoyed being young like that and being taken care of until it was taken away. I've essentially been an adult for a year now, but being nineteen is like, the end of all possiblility of being taken care of.
Now, all I have to look forward to is being an adult, being a mom, bills, and mortgages, and careers...
And that's no fun...
*sigh* I miss you, daylight.
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
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5 comments:
Yeah, but essentially your time is always your time to do what you want. You may be older with responsibilities, sure, but think of it this way: When you first got a job it was a huge thing and you thought you'd never get used to it. But after a couple shifts you started getting the hang of it. Then, a month later, you're the master of the place. You know exactly what you're doing, you're productive, you're ahead of the curve.
Well, when you get this heap of responsibility, all you have to remember is that it will all come in time, and then it's your choice again to do what you will. You have the time to, you have the money to and you have new people you've met ot do them with. THere's still a long way to go before you're a mom Alleah.
Growing up is ALL ABOUT YOU in your head, and you just need to remember that. If you do what feels right to you, things will come at a pace you're comfortable with. As cliche as it may be, 'you're just in a responsibility underpass connecting to the trans-canada, the light'll be back pretty quick.
:D I love you, Jordan Gregoire...I don't think it was the impending adulthood, and motherhood, and whatnot that depressed me in this post so much as the end of any possibility of being a child anymore.
i kind of understand that...its not that you always want to be a kid, its the fact that even if you wanted to you can never be a kid again...
I just made and I miss post too
and then i read this and realized you wrote one, i giggled
exactly, lisa! and Martha, you're cute!
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