Saturday, December 04, 2004

throat is in such pain at this moment...

you know what I just don't understand sometimes? High school theatre. I have just been reading Mel's drama journal (on Blogger! what a smart cookie she is!) and it made me regretful that I did not start one of my own. I should have liked to have one, so I could have all of my impressions down in writing when they were still fresh.

another thing that I got while reading her journal was a sense of serious confusion about the subtleties of high school theatre. You really have to have the right touch with it, especially if you are teaching it, or directing it, or even being in a leadership role. Because reading some of Mel's impressions of things that happened during MuTh, I remembered how I felt about them. I remembered how sometimes I just WISHED that I had the authority to make my own changes. Not so much in the directing, adn DEFINITELY not in the band side of things, but FOR SURE in the singing. Honestly, I remember wanting to teach the chorus that music so badly. I just didn't agree with the way Mr. Irving taught it. It didn't help out the students. He, of course, is not to blame for that, being a band teacher primarily, and not a choral teacher, or even voice teacher at all. But being so specialized really handicapped the chorus in the vocal department. There are so many elements of Bye Bye Birdie that were neglected because of the vocal teaching conendrum. Honestly, Ed Sullivan could have been astonishing. Given the amount of quality performers that show was complimented with, the vocal work is truly a disappointment. The actors are somewhat to blame for the sub-standardness of the vocals. To some extent they are, because (these are just my own personal pet peeves) almost none of them know proper chorus singing technique, they have absolutely no experience with singing harmony excpet for a very select few, they don't know the difference between choral vowels (Ed Sullivan) and Musical Theatre enunciation (every other chorus number in that play), PRACTICALLY EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM LISTENS TO WHOEVER SINGS OUT THE LOUDEST AND MOST CONFIDENT, AND LEANS LIKE THE MOFOS THAT THEY ARE (which clearly drives me absolutely insane! lol!), and half the time, the person that sings out loudly and confidently HAS PICKED THE WRONG NOTE TO START ON! Half of them don't listen to the band AT ALL. None of them know their starting pitch when the band plays it in every single song. Alost every single song, everybody leans on the alto line, event hough THE FREAKING BAND IS PLAYING THE MELODY. And in half the songs, all you can hear is alto, because all the strong singers who know what they are doing are singing alto. Therefore, they all *follow the leader* and start singing whatever they can hear other people singing, which is always alto. Not only that, but during the learning stage, the altos that I sang on could never get their pitch (because of course, most Dovers aren't used to singing harmony) so they always listened to me to get their note. Now the alto is super strong, but the sopranos don't know their line, don't have any volume, any tone quality, and HAVE NO CONCEPT THAT WHAT THEY ARE SUPPOSED TO BE SINGING IS THE MELODY AND MUST BE BROUGHT OUT! And I can't go up to their line to help them out, because I never learned their part!!! Honestly, I wish it could be like, me, and two other loud people on alto, and that's it. But tonight is closing, so it's not like that'll ever happen. (btw, pretty much every part of this ranty paragraph has to do with the teen chorus.) Now even altos who originally had it are singing the wrong line, and I can't fix it, because it's closing show, and nobody listens to me anyway. Seriously, over the course of the show, HOW MANY notes on the vocal work have I given? TOO MANY TO FREAKING COUNT. It is not freaking possible that I am the only teen girl who knows how to sing in a chorus. I seriously wish that I could have taught voice. Or had someone I trust teach voice. And I never worked with Lisa before the show even opened, so I don't trust her. I don't know how she works, and I don't know if what she does DOES work at all. It's just that half the choral numbers are NOT UP TO MY STANDARDS. And I understand that I cannot apply my standards of work to everybody else on the chorus, but I cannot help it. If it is my role (which chorus is), then I demand awesemity, if not perfection, of myself, and everybody doing the same line. Seriously, there is a wealth of fantastic music to play with in this musical! In Telephone Hour, the teen girls have four part harmony when the soloists first start singing as a group! It is not even particularly difficult harmony! And yet it has been neglected! And I absolutely KNOW that the singers on those lines could handle that harmony. They are perfectly capable of doing a fantastic job of it. The One Boy harmony parts I haven't actually listened to particularly, but I am sure there is a way of improving them to even greater fantasticality than it already is at. Again, the singers of that harmony line are PERFECTLY CAPABLE of doing justice to a well-written harmony line. And yet, it has not been given as much attention as it perhaps should have. And Ed Sullivan...! Oh, Ed Sullivan. Don't even get me STARTED on Ed Sullivan. Now, you all have to understand, Ed Sullivan is written in a religiously choral style. That means, FULL chords (not just soprano, second soproano SOMETIMES and tenor), proper posture, open vowels, and tall, clear, choral high notes. NOT Musical Theatre voice. There is a VERY LARGE DIFFERENCE between the two, and in Bye Bye Birdie, you must be able to turn it on and off. I mean, for God's sake, all this stuff I am saying about posture and vowels is FRICKIN IN CHARACTER! The chorus is ***AWED*** at the fact that the Macaffee household is going to be on this ***MOST REVERED OF TELEVISION PROGRAMS*** I know that! Why doesn't anyone else??? Now, Mr. Irving did make a CURSORY attempt at teaching us all the harmony to Ed Sullivan. But, for goodness sakes, when you are teaching choral music, to NON-choral students, you must spend hours on it! Hours and hours and hours. Especially on the harmony parts, and especially especially on the DIFFICULT harmony parts, like tenor, which often is on the third of the chord. And ESPECIALLY ESPECIALLY ESPECIALLY when the kids you are teaching are RETARDED AND WON'T LISTEN TO YOU WHEN YOU TEACH, or are tone deaf. Which is what almost every single male in this chorus is. Either an ignorant ridiculous asshole, or a bad singer. I seriously scorn the males in Ed Sullivan. Scorn scorn scorn. You know why? Because aside from a couple of noteables (Gareth, Glenn), the tenor section in Ed Sullivan IS MADE UP OF FEMALES!!!!! Seriously, guys! Have some freaking shame already! Is it not enough for you, that the very best girls from the adult chorus have to move to your line, because you are either a bad singer, or YOU ARE NOT PAYING ATTENTION!?!?!?! Honestly! You are paying for it now! Because you are onstage, and you DON'T know your line, and you are trying vainly to sing the melody which was written TOO FREAKING HIGH FOR YOUR PATHETIC MALE VOICES TO HANDLE because you were TOO FUCKING RETARDED TO PAY ATTENTION WHEN YOU WERE LEARNING! And to boot, there are GIRLS showing you up at your own line. THAT is why I scorn the males in Ed Sullivan. Because almost every single one of them sucks, and they have no one to blame for it but themselves.

Wow, I just reread that whole paragraph, and that is one SUPER rant. I actually meant to keep my composure with this post, but I spose that notion has failed. Well, anyways, all of those beefs had to do with the teen chorus, although I am sure that there are things that could improve with the adult chorus as well. In my opinion, there is ALWAYS something to improve. And although over-rehearsing is a bad thing, everybody has to just keep coming back to it, because it's the only way we are going to improve, and in my opinion, the vocals could use some improvement. I hope I didn't offend anyone with my big rant, especially the guys in Ed Sullivan. I do so love you all, but as far as I am concerned, the tenor line is the worse for you guys not paying attention during rehearsal. And you have no one to blame for that but yourselves.

In fact, we all could have been better behaved in rehearsal. And now, as well, actually. I hate that every single day, we have had to yell at people to shut up, or be yelled at to shut up. Now, by saying that, I don't mean to be stuck up, and say that I was perfect, because I DEFINITELY wasn't. And I know that. But I admit it. And I have that rule in my head. Every day at rehearsal, I made a concious effort to be on task. If any of you noticed, on music days, I spent every break going over my part. Playing my part on the piano over and over again until I could sing it in my sleep. (I probably HAVE sung it in my sleep, knowing me! lol!) And if I seem a little arrogant, and unforgiving with the vocals, please understand that it is coming from having done that every single Wednesday, every single break. I worked my ass off to be absolutely sure that I was goingt o do the best I possibly could in this show. And having worked my ass off, believe me when I say that I know the music like the back of my hand. BECAUSE I KNOW THE MUSIC LIKE THE BACK OF MY HAND!!! To the girls who were telling me that the alto line went up in "Penn Station to Sweet Apple"...IT DOESN'T! And the reason why I know that, is because I went over it a hundred times when we first learned it. The soprano line goes up, not alto! And even never having learned it, I could sing it right now for you, because I have practiced my line, the alto line so many times WITH the soprano line that I can visualize the music in my head! I know this stuff. I am a choral student. I have NOT forgotten which line goes up, and which line stays the same. And if you are going to be be singing the same part as me, then FUCKING SING WHAT I AM SINGING. I am not being so steadfast on this because I am a bitch and arrogant. I am being so steadfast on this because I worked on it SO MUCH when we first learned it. Believe me, I haven't forgotten the line! I sing it the same today as I did two months ago.

Anyways, on with the blog. I am done with this whole rant now. Again, I apologize if I have offended anyone. Tell me about it when I see you, and I will try to help you understand my position. I won't ask any of you to agree with me on any of this, just accept it as the way I have seen things as they transpired.

9 comments:

VivaLaPinto said...

btw, these are all technical beefs, and have nothing to do with anyone personally, ok? this is me in work mode, which is very different from the Pinto you all know and --love???

Brianna said...

Alleah, our music is awesome. Have you forgotten Music Man and Copa? compared to them ( musically) were the best thing since sliced bread. And also, you couldnt musically direct, because you cant play the piano or read music.

VivaLaPinto said...

Brianna, are you actually that oblivious, or do you just hate me??? I can read music, and always have been able to, and i can play the piano well enough to teach a vocal line! and i wasn't talking about musically directing, necessarily, that's a different thing. i was talking about teaching, and working the vocal music.

Pineapple Princess! said...

hey boo on lack of sopranos! I'm a soprano! and rose and I try to sing backstage as much as we can. Its truly unfortunate that we didn't get some of the strong singers on the teen soprano line, adult sopranos are relatively stong though.... yay soprano!!!!

barbara_mary said...

You guys remember that anti-love rule we made for LauraTim? Well let's have a semi-peace rule for you two, Alleah and Brianna.

K said...

I question your warning about "over-practising"... I mean, I can't imagine how much would be considered over-practising? Can you give me an idea? 'cause, we practised a lot in my choir, even hours on the day of competition, and as a result, we didn't suck, we won. So I would like a mightier defense of that.

Also, nice rant

VivaLaPinto said...

Well, Kevin, you know that feeling that you get after you've practiced a song, or a scene, or a dance so many times that you begin to absolutely despise every single little thing about it? Either because it is difficult, or because it's monotonous, or because you have nothing really to do, and for most of the scene/dance you stand around being bored? That is over-practising a song/scene/dance. And there are different levels of over-practicing for different scenes/songs/dances. For instance, it is absolutely impossible to hear the song "Telephone Hour" or "Cool Yule" more than seven times in one day and NOT begin to hate it with every fiber of your being. On the flip side, it is ENTIRELY possible to sing "Bridge Over Troubled Water" "Bohemian Rhapsody" "Lord I Know I Been Changed" or "A Nightengale Sang in Berkeley Square" all day long, and never get tired of it, not to mention dance "Honestly Sincere" over and over again until you puke. Because those thing's levels of over-practice-ness are MUCH MUCH MUCH higher than "Telephone Hour"'s.

VivaLaPinto said...

and we all know that once you start to hate something, you start to suck beans at it (and by beans, I do NOT mean Bethany Clarke! dirty minds! jeex!). And THAT is why over-practicing is bad. Because it leads to irkedness, and then hatred of the thing in question, and that leads to reduced effort at said thing, which leads to craptaculosity during performance of said thing. Ban over-practicing.

VivaLaPinto said...

AAAANNDD...(sorry, one more thing) THAT is why I should teach this stuff. Because I can explain an abstract concept like over-practicing, and still keep all my concepts straight in my brain. So boo on Brianna. (*not knowing how to read music, JEEZ, LOUISE!!! grumble grumble irk irk irk*)