furry anarchy pain!

oh, man, the utter inability of today's youth to do something as simple as spell...we found that phrase written on a bridge in Sharpie sometime two days ago.

so yes, the past two days may come to equal painful painful death in the weeks to come. yesterday, I went out to the lake for Lake Day. Pathetic turn out, by the way. Shame on all you lamers who were probably too lazy to come! however, Brianna, Barbara, Gareth, Mel (for a little bit), Spencer, Aden, Foo, and Foo's friend Pat. (not Paddy Barry) did show up. Small group for us, but still enjoyable. Tons and TONS of interesting teenage fun in the form of pushing each other off the dock many times.
Plus, threatening the group of irritating preteen simian subspecies, with whom we were forced to coexist, with prostate cancer if they swam under the dock. Quite enjoyable to be a modern dock tyrant.

Foo got the munchies, and me, him, Aden, and Pat all walked to the Chevron by the highway. Sucks to Parks and Rec's ass-mar, not having yummier food closer. Foo bought copious amounts of food to generously share with the group. Coming back, we saw this ridiculously dilapidated house that Foo wanted to break into and vandalize. Oh, the values of youth! We didn't then, but Foo vowed to do so in the near future.

After returning to the lake, swimming some more, and eating food, we all decided to head out. By that time, the group had dwindled to Brianna, myself, Spencer, Aden, Foo, and Pat. We moseyed on over to run-down shack of grossness, and Foo, Pat, and I went exploring. It was yucky inside, and we found an icky bathtub that Foo wanted to carry out into the middle of the street in the middle of the night, for some random fun. Spencer, Aden, and Brianna chose to shun us by standing in the street and singing Rocky Horror Picture Show songs.

So, details are not necessary, but suffice it to say that Foo, and Pat, and to some extent, myself took out some teenage angst on pitied house of disrepair. Finally, we parted ways, with Spence and Brianna returning to the lake to await Spencer's mom's pickup, and Aden going with me, Foo, and Pat to become corrupted in our nefarious presences.

We all decided to go to Foo's house to hang out, and somewhere along the line, we picked up Talissa (girl I knew from Music Man (what a retarded name for a musical), and that Aden knew from Copa Cabana). So with Talissa, we all made our way to Foo's house, stopping along the way to see if a random dude named Allen wanted to hang out with us. He didn't. So we got to the Dobson residence, and drank lemonade, and ate burgers while being molested by wasps out on the porch. Foo, and Kevin's Dad, Grant, showed us his rather morbid side by murdering a poor wasp with an electrical-death tennis racket, while clad in nothing but a housecoat. How performance arti-ish.

After copious amounts of massage by Aden, and talking about the Evil Dead movies, eventually Talissa left, and Foo, Pat, Aden, and myself were left at odds.

Foo's mom decided to be death by wanting Foo to stay home that night, so we decided that we needed to do some sneaking around. He told her that we were going down to Departure Bay Beach (which we actually did do), and he would be back by ten. She allowed this small concession to Foo's freedom, and we were off. Along the way, we went to mini-Paddy, Cam Ferguson's house, and picked him up. Actually, looking back, through my sleep-fogged memory, I believe the initial reason for stopping there was to convince Paddy to boot for us, but the Cam was an added bonus. (especially for me...you don't get to know what i mean by that!)

We went down to the beach through the ravine. Foo and Cam broke a lot of sticks, mostly on park signs, and trees, but I believe a couple sticks were broken upon people's appendages. Although, maybe not. Stupid inferior memory from two days ago!

When we emerged from the ravine/park thing, we came upon a disgruntled citizen, who had heard us screaming, and breaking things in the forest, and inquired as to the state of Foo's mental health. That was amusing, however, we got the message, and obliged said disgruntled citizen by leaving as soon as possible.

We stopped in 7Eleven (why, oh why, when that name is basically made up of numbers, must it be spelled with a mixture of numbers, and letters? does that make the founders of 7Eleven cool? I think not) to get some random candy. Aden shared his watermelon candies with us. How sweet. I like him. He didn't really do a lot of stuff that I noticed other than have a sword fight with Foo with sticks, and give me an orgasmic massage, but still, hanging out with him was nice. I like him, I think, he'll make a good friend. I approve, Brianna.

Then we made our way along the beach front to go out to Smoker's Point. Stupid tide was up, so our travel was marked with rock climbing, cement-wall scaling, wading, and some random running through people's yards thrown in just for good measure. Why couldn't we have just gone through the path by the road? Silly boys who enjoy seeing wussy girls injure themselves to keep up.

Hanging out there was quite enjoyable, and not ONLY for the reason all my granola-packed responsible friends are thinking of. We saw a heron, which was magical. I love wild life! However, my esteemed offendees did not appreciate nature's work of art, and demonstrated lack of intelligience by screaming at it. Except for Pat. He was the one who saw it first, and pointed it out. Good Pat. Want a biscuit? Sit, boy, sit! We also did a ton of wading in really nice-feeling water. Sitting on rocks, and dangling tootsies in water was really nice in a non-pot-smoking kind of way. Anyways, Pat was totally raring to get high, so as soon as we were there, he started rolling. He lit up, and passed it around. It was kind of pathetically rolled, if you ask me, but hey, wtf do I know about the subject?

There's a random swing there, and Foo, and Cam were playing on it. Aden had to be home by eight thirty, I think, and when we got there, it was already nine'o'clock, so he had to go after a tiny amount of hanging out, for which I was saddened. Also Cam perched on a rock and announced to us all that he was a flamingo, and that we should all pose on the rocks, and hold hands. So we did. He was a flamingo, I was a bush, Foo was a tree, and Pat was a rock. Which was very telling of his mental state at that point. We all held hands until silly Foo broke the circle of nature. Cam was pissed. Then we all sat on a rock, and hung out until it got dark.

Getting back was problematical, and we went the easy way! If we had gone back the way we had come, I would have died. Or simply lost a sandal. But as it went, we took the path back to Hammond Bay Rd., which happens to go through someone's driveway. Anyways, it was already dark, and the only illumination we had was someone's lighter, so we made Foo, and/or Cam lead with the lighter so that we'd be able to find our way through irritable bramble-laden pathway. I think I acquired a new record of scratches, and injuries just in that small amount of time, alone. Anyways, we made it out, but unfortunately were way too loud for our own good, and we made disgruntled citizen #2 (the one who's driveway is part of the path) angry at us, and tell us to go somewhere else. We tried to, but in the dark, and general sense of disorientedness, we ended up in a compost heap, after which disgruntled citizen #2 took pity on us, and allowed us to traverse his driveway to get to the road.

Once on the road, luck had befallen us! Paddy was coming back from dropping Jessi off at her house, and picked us all up! Joy, and happiness. He drove us all back to Cam/Paddy's house, where Pat managed to convince Paddy to go boot for us. Maybe it was just Paddy trying to get Pat to shut the hell up. The kid had been whining about wanting to get drunk all night. Way uncool.

As it was now roughly ten'o'clock (maybe later, I didn't check) Foo was obligated to make his way home. Understandably, he didn't want to go, and attempted to call his mom, and ask to stay later, but she shut that down quicker than you can say juvenile delinquent. He ran home, to get back in good graces with his mom (don't be too impressed, he had ulterior motives for gaining her good favor).

Silly addicted Pat rolled another joint, and was generally a lamer, so Cam and I hung out on the trampoline. I love trampolines! Seriously, every child who grows up without one is deprived. And malnutritioned in the fun department. That's right, Mom! You neglected me by not buying me a trampoline. Feel the pain! Dance with me, Lois! (oh, family guy. *sigh*) Anyways, back to the point, trampoline was major major fun. Cam wanted me to take out my rage on the tree that hangs above the tramp. That was also amusing in a destructive kind of way. And so, if you somehow come across me barraging something with inprobable insults, and then screaming 'take out your rage on the tree', well that's where it came from, ok?

Eventually Paddy returned, bearing vodka, and gin. It was a strange kind of vodka, one I've never had before, but whatever. They didn't have much in the way of mixers, so I satisfied myself with a White Russian (vodka + milk. can also have Kahlua added, but it's not necessary). However, they had icky 1% milk, so I had to keep topping it up with milk to avoid grossness. Paddy had me take a shot of straight new kind of vodka. It burned. Oh how pleasant that burning was!

Also, Paddy shared the use of his pipe with us, and life was much better. Paddy is better than Pat at everything concerning weed. (don't be surprised at the lack of description form hereonforth, I don't remember much) We all just hung out after that. I don't remember a whole lot, other than that for a while the four of us hung out on the tramp, looking at the stars, and discussing alien space ships. Paddy told us about a couple experiences he had. He tried to make a point to me, but I don't remember what it was, nor did I really understand it at the point he made it, cause I remember him being like, "WTF, are you talking about?" I don't really remember what happened after that until Cam helped Pat into the hammock where he slept for a long time, and Cam retired to the tramp, armed with blanket, and..pillow? I don't remember.

After that, Paddy and I stayed up talking about classical music, and smoking up. Dear god, I love listening to classical music. We listened to a lot of Bach, played by this classical guitarist that Paddy loves. As well, Paddy played me a peice he had written himself. Very beautiful, and I am not kidding. Parts that are entirely unexpected, and some interesting transitions from movement to movement. I was seriously impressed. Also Paddy just sat down at the piano, and just played whatever came to mind which was insanely wonderful because the music was so coherent, and rarely did he make a mistake. I mean, seriously, now that is admirable. I love Paddy for that. That he can just sit there, and let this emotional, meaningful music just flow right form his fingertips into the instrument...and he's never taken lessons, except for trumpet...or trombone, I can't remember which.

Anyways, that entire part of the night was nothing but absolute bliss. I adore talking music with Paddy. Although, I'm a little sad, because I learned some valuable information about the technicalities of classical music that are now lost to the annals of drug-induced stupor.

Hey, I remember...these really yummy candies that Paddy gave me. He told me not to tell Cam about them...I don't think I did.

So, the plan of the night was, that Foo (being as rebellious, and angst-ridden as he is) would sneak out at roughly one-thirty, and we would go raise some hell. However, Paddy, and myself were the only ones still up at one thirty in the morning. So I vaguely remember Cam, making his way into his room to sleep sometime during classical-music-appreciating time. So, in order to fulfill said plan, I explored Pddy's house until I discovered Cam's room. It was kind of retarded, if I had just opened the first door I came to, I would have found him, but I had to try all the other doors on that level of the house first...cause I'm stupid. But anyways, I found him, and tried tearing off his covers, while talking loudly in his ear about how it was time to go get Foo. He kept asking me if he could just get, "like a minute more of sleep? please?" and I was like, no. I am stoned, drunk, AND a wakeup tyrant, so you're screwed; get your ass out of bed. I'm pretty sure I didn't actually say that. But it would have been awesome if I did! Every time he said that, he would just roll over, and I knew there was no chance he would ever get up if I left him alone, so I threatened to go get a glass of water and throw it on him. That notion sent Paddy into giggling peroxyms of the kind you would expect from an immature school girl. I really don't think Cam expected me to do it. I mean, hey, I suppose in other, "normal" families, they don't do that...well lucky Cam, he had to hang out with the one girl whose family DOES do that! Cam refused to get up, so I told him, "ok, I'm getting a glass of water now," and made my way out to the kitchen to do exactly that. I got my glass, and found my way back into Cam's room. By this time, Paddy was just hysterical with giggles. He kept asking me, "are you actually gonna do it?" and I was like, "of course I am. he has to get up, and help me go get Foo!" so i went in there, armed with my water, and started to pour, but lucky Cam either opened his eyes, and saw impending doom of the damp variety, or got splashed with a little bit (my hand was very unsteady), and got up in a hurry. Either way, it was intense amusement. However, there was a bit of a cringe moment in that, I tripped over Cam's guitar, and I didn't even notice until horrendus, gut-wrenching guitar-injury noise penetrated my determined fog. I tell ya, that got Cam up pretty quick! Anyways, he was all saying that he had to get dressed, and that we had to get out of his room. We did, but we didn't trust hm at all, so Paddy and I just waited outside his room. We kept asking if he was up, and he kept answering us, so we assumed he was actually up. However, after roughly--I dunno, a minute?--we barged right back in, and HE WAS NOT UP!!! surprising? not really. infuriating to an inebriated Capricorn? absolutely! now, I don't actually know what we did after that to get him out of his bed, but somehow, we did, cause I remember barging in another time, and catching Cam standing there confused in the middle of dressing. also, unbeknownst (that's not a word, but w/e) to me, someone went and woke Pat up. dunno who it was, but I know it happened cause he was with us the rest of the night.

Finally, we were on our way to our true mission. Find Foo, get him up, and go terrorize the vulnerably sleeping city. Now we did a hell of a lot of walking that night, that much I remember. I can vaguely remember our routes, but not enough to tell you about them. Not that you care. "Give us more drunken escapades" you scream. So I shall. Maybe.

We found Foo's house, and snuck around to the back where his light was on. I assume he was asleep, cause his "alarm didn't go off". We whispered his name, and threw things at his window. We were all influenced by substances, so I don't think any of us realized that there was a screen impeding the path of our projectiles until I knocked it into the room with an overly forceful pitch of a stick. Well, that turned out to be a good thing, because sharp metal objects falling on sleeping Foos tend to induce wakefulness. His groogy face finally appeared in that square of light we were all staring at, and he made his way downstairs to emerge through the side door.

I believe after that, we just went wandering. At least, I don't remember doing anything of any significance. The next thing I remember was arriving at Tim Hortons, where Pat bought a huge thing of donuts, Foo, and Cam both got...something. And I begged water, cause I'm poor. We just sat there quietly, doing not much of anything, I'm pretty sure. Bastardly Foo stole my water after one mere guzzle of it, and drank the entire thing. Stupid dehydration. It sucks.

After that, we meandered some more. We went somewhere...a gas station I think. I don't remember what we did there. It might have been Mac's. Then we did...even MORE travelling of the on-foot variety! I'm pretty sure after that, we just went back to Cam's house, where Foo finally got drunk, and high. Paddy had gone to bed, so we all hung out on the tramp by ourselves. The rest of the night passed in a blur of sensations...that I won't describe.

Eventually, Foo, and Pat decided to absent themselves. I think they went inside to play videogames, but I cannot be sure. There was also some passage of time inserted in there somewhere, because after the sky had lightened a bit, Foo came outside, and me and him hung out a bit. We pissed Paddy off by talking loudly outside his room. Whoops. Actually...I'm pretty sure he was talking loudly, and I was scarfing Raisin Bran, because I remember feeling slightly superior in an I-am-innocent-of-this-nonsense kind of way.

At roughly seven thirty, Foo returned to his domicile, we heard later, only to be accosted by an enraged mother who has since grounded him into obscurity. He called me about ten minutes ago, because his parents had left to see Kevin off, and he was alone to use the phone which has also been denied him. His mom is threatening him with private school. He was raging about that the whole time we were on the phone.

Anyways...there was a little bit more to my night of disapproved-upon mischeif. Pat left at like nine...maybe eight...or possibly ten. I dunno. He left, that's all I can say for sure. Cam and I hung out until I finally left at three. That's right! 3 pm! Over sixteen hours late! and no that's not a new record!

And you know why my mom rocks way more than yours does??? cause I got home with the afore-mentioned amount of lateness already hanging over my head, AND random evidence of wrong-doing on my person, and she STILL DIDN'T FREAK!!!!! I love my family!!! But not my sister when she's lazy and messy.

Anyways, Cam saw me off at a ridiculously perfect time to catch the bus (it appeared at the exact second I arrived at a stop), and I gave him my email. I suppose this is going to turn out like the cliche, *"give-me-your-number-and-I'll-call-you"-and-then-NEVER-DOES* scenario...but whatever. I have a bad feeling that my reputation has been ruined forever, but you know what? I have lost too many brain cells to really give much of a rusty fuck.

I arrived home and fell into bed and slept to around ten pm. Mom forced me to get up, and eat some stuff. I was much more interested in drinking all the milk in the house. After I couldn't sleep so I hung out with Sherayna here in the den, and called Geoff back, cause apperently he had called while I was asleep. He tried to pull some kind of intervention crap. ("what's with you? you're not eating, and you've gained weight, and you're hanging out with stoner jerk Foo all the time?" more random whining. sounds of me bashing things with sticks at the mention of my weight gain.) After that, I went and watched some TV with the fantastic Mom of awesemity. Finally at roughly twelve I was tired enough to fall back asleep. And that was the end of my two-day run of irresponsibility.

Bad news is, 'lexis-girl seems to have taken a disliking to me, ever since hanging out with Cam all night. apparently she had something of a thing going with him, that somehow I fucked up. If stupid Foo would ever GIVE ME HER DAMN EMAIL, I would send a heartfelt letter of contrition, and reconciliation. I really like her, and nobody ever mentioned anything to me about her + Cam =ing hands off-ness. She has apparently cut up my sex bracelet and burnt it in malicious rage against me, and I do feel horribly. I would like to fix things, becuase I do find her to be an entertaining individual to hang out with.

And in other news, I also feel very guilty about the whole not contributing to any of the substance-acquiring that I have nonetheless been partaking of lately. I have vowed to finance any future expeditions so as to redeem myself in my own eyes.

at any rate, after sleeping a ridiculous amount of time, I have finally gained some kind of equilibrium with the world. goody for me. I hope you had fun reading this vocabularizing-your-ass-off, morning-after entry, cause I sure had fun writing it!




PS: ring ring goes the bell...

stupid school. I hate it for having the audacity to come back. Nobody likes you! You're short, and ugly, and your parents should have aborted you. Take out your rage on the tree! (*haha, Cam!*)